June 2, 2006

Faith had a Brady epidsode this morning around 5:45 in which she had to be rescued with oxygen. Please say a prayer for her ... I'll update as I receive more information.

A few hours later...

I got to the NICU this morning at 10:00, anticipating spending at least 90 minutes with the girls. But when I got there, there was a sign on the door that the NICU would be closing at 10:30 for a procedure (they often do minor surgeries in the NICU, but must ask all visitors to leave when they do it). That meant only 30 minutes with my babies. Already mentally unstable, the tears welled up in my eyes.

I walked in and saw Gracie first (she faces the door). Her little chubby face was so peaceful as she slept and she looked so warm and cozy in her isolette (what Todd calls a baby condo). I just wanted to crawl in there with her.

I walked around the other side to see Faith, but I wasn't prepared for what I'd see. Once again, an oxygen pump was next to Faith's bed and there was an IV pole next to that. I saw my little angel lying there, eyes open, but barely breathing and not moving at all. It seemed that she was having an episode as soon as I walked in. I had to stand by helplessly while the nurse put the oxygen mask over her mouth and pumped air into her lungs manually. Her heartrate slowly rose and her breathing resumed. It was just about more than I could handle.

I started asking lots of questions and, thankfully, the nurse was so patient with me and answered everything.

The blood and urine cultures aren't back yet (they take a full three days), but Faith's CBC (complete blood count) came back with certain items out of normal range, indicating what is probably an infection. There is no telling if it's bacterial or viral, so they already have her on two antibiotics (Vasomyacin and Genomyacin -- or something like that) to cover a number of things that it could be, if it's bacterial. If it's viral, there is nothing to do but wait it out. The cultures may or may not indicate an infection, too. If they come back negative, it may just mean that the infection didn't make it into the bloodstream (a very good thing!), but could still be present.

Faith's temperature is still unstable, back down to 97.1 this morning. Her isolette is self-correcting, meaning that it knows how warm or cool she is and will adjust itself accordingly. I guess that's good, but I'd just rather not have the problem.

In short, we still don't know what's wrong, but we're taking steps to work on what is probably an infection. It's all very scary and sad and I could have stood there all morning, holding Faith's hand and watching as her eyes darted back and forth, looking for answers. I feel bad that I didn't spend much time with Grace and, from what I understand from other moms of twins, this guilt will go on for the rest of my life. If I do for one, I'll feel compelled to do something similar for the other.

I'll post as I know more. This is killing me...

E